Love Won't You Stay

http://derekjoyce.bandcamp.com/track/love-wont-you-stay

There are times of your life where you regret what you've done. You know that you have wronged someone because of what you have done or said. The words left your mouth, the punch connected with their jaw, your greedy money stayed in your pocket. Your conscience is plagued by this irrepressible feeling of doing wrong. That isn't what this song is about.

There are other times in your life when you regret what you've done. You've prayed about the situation for months. You have stepped out of your comfort zone confronting and engaging in conversation people who you believe are making a mistake. Your heart breaks for the people involved to the point of tears and staying up at night. You have tried to see every perspective, every angle, every persons heart. And yet in the end, the result is the same. People are hurt. People are misunderstood.

This was a song about confusion. Something happened that I cannot reverse or take back, and even if I could, I am not sure what I would reverse or take back. Did the messiness need to happen? Was there a way I could have approached the situation differently? Its like you know its wrong, but your conscience can't quite pinpoint what would have been right. I have reached beyond the edge of my morality it seems.

I realize I am being somewhat ambiguous, but this song is nothing more than a deep longing. It is not about a person but for the very essence of "love". It is my hope that regardless of what was wrong and right, love, won't you stay. I suppose again it is a song about forgiveness. For what I was not able to do, for the community I was not able to be a part of, the friendships I was not able to mend, the fear I live under, the morality I do not even understand: I forgive myself. I will never have it all together, but I was always keep pursuing it, and I will never stop giving and receiving grace.

Love Won't You Stay

I know this fight is less against this flesh and more a sign
That there's evil reaching in
My hands are tied but I can still kneel and pray
Cuts through the soul to the heart of things

Love, won't you stay

You have always been the home that we come back to
You're the reason we started
So mother why, the fear in your heart the concern in your eyes
Is my spine just weaker
The battle lines have been drawn in all the wrong places
Feels like I'm fighting for both sides

Love, won't you stay