Tomorrow I am starting my journey across Canada on bicycle.
The first question people ask me is, "are you doing it for a cause?"
Followed closely by, "are you going with anyone?"
Followed closely by, "are you going with anyone?"
My grandmother patients sharing a room the other day were aghast that my response to both questions was, "nope!" (Mostly just to the second one, "won't your mother be worried!")
It's a trip I've been planning on going on for years, and decided this was the year to do it in January. I am going for a number of reasons.
1) The beauty of Canada. I have never been east of Alberta (well, according to my memory, which is crippled to say the least) and wish to see the rest of this great land of ours. It is astonishing to me that I have traveled to Australia, China, Singapore, and Mexico, but have never seen a prairie sky or Atlantic Ocean lighthouse. Maybe not astonishing... just needing to be remedied. I look forward to taking it in province by province (sorry territories) at a slow pace, enjoying the little towns I pass through and spending nights outside.
2) The "get away from it all" factor. Driving back from West Lake with a friend a few weeks ago I commented to him that what I think I will most enjoy about the trip is the fact I don't have to go to work the next day, or have a music practice, or make that blood donors appointment (though I will still have to keep ignoring their persistent calls). It is a vacation in this sense I suppose, getting away from all the little responsibilities that, though enjoyable, prevent you from real rest.
I was biking up university hill listening to some Bright Eyes the other evening and felt amazing. The moon was out, the sky was colorful, I stared harmoniously at a deer grazing by the side of the road. Bliss.
3) Personal life reflection. One thing that surprised me graduating from university was the sudden lack of purpose. You go from having your life planned out for you, knowing that you will be attending school, a friend community burgeoning around you, summer jobs in place and transient, to no direction. Maybe not no direction... but certainly no one steering you in the direction you should go. Which is exciting! And terrifying... and what I fought for a few months after graduation. What do I want my next 5 years to look like? Not to etch it in stone, but to gather an idea of what I value most and how I want to pursue those things.
Now, having been out for a year, worked two jobs I really enjoy, and finished an album, I think it is a good time to get to work through what I really value. Do I want to keep living this way? What do I do with this money stuff? Am I fully alive doing what I am doing or do I need to change some things?
Now, having been out for a year, worked two jobs I really enjoy, and finished an album, I think it is a good time to get to work through what I really value. Do I want to keep living this way? What do I do with this money stuff? Am I fully alive doing what I am doing or do I need to change some things?
4) Its a challenge. Part of me really just wants to be challenged! Physically, emotionally, spiritually. I have only ever done 4 nights of overnight bike camping in my life (...few weeks ago in Banff - Jasper). I actually have made a point of not telling people in bike shops that I am going across Canada... because I feel like they might scoff at my lack of preparedness. I really don't know what lays ahead of me, but I am excited to do something I have never done before and get stretched.
Its been a good last few weeks. Tying up loose ends, finishing up work, having some good conversations. I feel that what I am scared of is losing some comfort and routine. Which is a good thing I think. May my rest be in the hands of the unchanging.
Its coming close, and Im a bit terrified, but I know in two months I wont regret it.
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