Hacky Sack

An Emily Carr veteran told me to inform her of stories I experience at Emily Carr. It is an exciting school, so they say. Or rather they say, “You’ll see some weird shit.” I thought I might chronicle a few of these experiences for amusement of the general population.

To those unaware, I am working with the Christian Community at Emily Carr this year, a progressive art school in Vancouver. First month, so I am getting to know folks, figure out my role, and becoming exposed to the weird and wonderful world of “art”.

They have a monthly coffee night/open mic night, so I thought I would sign up! You know, play some tunes, meet some people, and go experience the school spirit at Emily Carr. I go to sign up at the correct office and start chatting up the teacher there.

“What’s your name?” asks the bespectacled, mid-40s woman. I tell her. Her eyes light up.

“I had a favourite Derek that attended here!” Grateful for a well-respected namesake at Emily Carr  before my time, I smile and let her tell me about him.

“He just loved to be naked!  One time he came to my office covered in flour and dressed only in a towel! Then he just whipped off the towel!” I apologize for the image floating in your mind. The flour settling in the air to reveal “Food Network Gone Wild”.

“I thought it was so great, I brought him into my foundations class* and whipped the towel off of him in front of all the students!” *foundations class = 1st year students

“His ball sack was so saggy, he could have played hacky sack with it!”

I didn’t want to be her new favourite Derek. I didn’t want to make the top 10. And I won’t be baking with flour for the next 6 months, thank you.